“In 1971, after seven years in college, with that magic piece of paper clutched triumphantly in my fist, the best job I was able to get was night watchman on a sewer project in Babylon, N.Y. guarding a hole in the ground to prevent anyone from stealing it. God bless the American educational system!”

– Spider Robinson

This month went by so fast that I didn’t even realize it was over until yesterday afternoon. While the initial week was a little rough, the rest of my time flew by. During the first seven days of this challenge, I seriously questioned my decision not to go back to school. I got lonely and began to secretly fear that I actually had ruined my life. Visions of homelessness and a lifetime of menial labor flashed before my eyes.

After my initial adjustment, things started to pick up. My web business began to take off, I went on some cool trips, and made some new friends. I got busy and lost the luxury of sitting around and being depressed. Unfortunately, moving at a fast pace also caused me to miss out on a lot. Constant work leads to burnout, something I wish to avoid. Being a workaholic also makes you a really boring conversationalist, and I don’t want to transform myself into “the uptight career guy.” After all:

“All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.”

– Proverb

I need to free up some time. Whenever I eat now, I eat foods like protein bars or yogurt. Items that take zero preparation and can be consumed at my desk. I want more time so I can have sit down meals, go for nature hikes, or occasionally sleep in. While I’m planning on reducing my hours at work, I want to find some additional ways to become more efficient.

The side business that makes me the most money is also the most time consuming. As such, I want to find ways to streamline it and reduce my input. Expect this month’s challenge to get a little Tim Ferriss-esque.

Besides maximizing my efficiency, I also plan on writing about such lofty subjects as: selecting a good Halloween costume, cooking meat in a crockpot, power napping, green tea, lesbians, computer stuff, web traffic, adventures I’ve gone on, and being fiscally responsible.

I think it will be a fun month.

“Never miss a party…good for the nerves–like celery.”

– F. Scott Fitzgerald

Most of the kids in my age range assume that I’m living it up. I constantly get told “f*ck school! You just get to do whatever without having debt. That’s awesome.” Apparently everyone believes that I hang out and party all day without having grueling responsibilities like BSing my way through essays or sporadically attending class.

This impression actually makes some sense, since it’s the image I try and project whenever I go out. Every weekend I hit up a different campus and try to squeeze as much fun into those two days as humanly possible. The combination of appearing to be everywhere and pretending your life is non-stop fun is enough to convince most people that you’re the real world Van Wilder.

Hopping around from state-to-state going to ever major event at every major university is fun, but it’s not my actual life.

Truth be told, I only have fun twice a week. The rest of my time is spent grinding. I have to balance a job that frequently requires me to work overtime with boxing, blogging, a slew of web ventures, and developing my writing ability. I literally don’t have the time to have fun, watching a movie or going out wouldn’t fit into my schedule. As it is, I only get three hours of sleep on some nights.

In the past I always had the time, but never the resources to do anything. I wasted a lot of hours doing nothing. Now it’s a different story.

“Who ever heard of a rich human resources manager?”

– Felix Dennis, How To Get Rich

My job isn’t hard, I get along with all my coworkers, and my boss is nice. Despite all these things I still hate going to work.

Sans my stint as a Christmas tree vendor, every job I’ve ever done has sucked.

When I was in school working for someone else didn’t seem so bad. I was part time. Even my worst days weren’t terrible, I always had “something better ahead of me.” Once I graduated there would be some lucrative job waiting. Other people hated their jobs because they were lazy, I’d love wherever I was hired.

Since entering the full time working world, I’ve realized why middle aged alcoholics exist. Why guys would rather blow out their brains than live to see another day. The revelation that you’ll be wasting decades of your life for a paycheck is horrifying.

You go to a job for five days straight, they give you two days to recuperate. Then it’s back to grind. If you’re lucky, they’ll give you a gold watch in exchange for 30 years of your life.

Once you’re done with school there is no next level to advance to. It’s just a repetitive slog until you die. Realizing this is a great motivator. I’d rather work hard and carve my own path than meekly submit to a lifetime of servitude.

“Silicon Valley is a mindset, not a location.”

– Reid Hoffman

It’s 1913, you live in a rural town.

Barnes & Noble have yet to be invented. As such, books are expensive and something of a rarity. Depending on how rural your community is, there’s a good chance that you won’t have a lot of contact with people outside the community. Barring military conscription into an overseas conflict, you’ll probably never leave the country. In fact, there’s a good chance you’ll never leave your own state.

The main social center in your community is a church. It’s where where everyone congregates, where gossip and ideas are spread.

Since you and all your neighbors have similar lifestyles, backgrounds, and interests; and since you are all bound by the same social stigmas, there aren’t going to be a lot of fresh ideas circulating the community.

It’s 1963, you live in a small city.

Congratulations, you live in an era where “naive turnip farmer” isn’t your default social class. Unfortunately, it was for all your older relatives. Your parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles; still, more than likely, cling to their old ideals.

You and all the other young people go off to college. You’re introduced to world of new ideas. Academia becomes your social center. A place where new ideas are spread. For the first time ever you’re in a place where you can question the world without facing a crushing social stigma. From this point forth, higher education becomes a beacon of progress and change within America. There is no theory too radical to explore within the confines of campus.

It’s 2013, you live wherever you want.

As fate would have it, a miraculous device was invented shortly before you were born. Even better, it’s low price tag meant that you grew up with it. Unlike all your predecessors you are lucky enough to own a computer. With it you can explore almost all the knowledge in the universe. There’s a near limitless archive of literature, art, mathematical equations, and scientific theories; all available at the click of a button. Oh, and there’s a lot naked women too. Seriously, you can probably see more breasts in twenty seconds than all your ancestors did in their combined lifetimes.

By luck of the draw, you were born into a world where magic boxes can provide you with whatever you desire.

Any thought you have, no matter how crazy, can be shared with the entire world. And, surprisingly, you’ll discover other people who agree. You can make a business with no tangible components. Sell words written in electric ink to a corporation in Moldavia, total delivery time: two seconds. If you want to learn something, be it calculus or picking up women, you can find thousands of mentors. The days of trekking to Tibet, searching for sensi are long since past. Some of the world’s greatest experts are a mere Tweet away.

Within our lifetime, I suspect the university to become a quaint relic of a past long forgotten.

“When is now; when was then?”

– Bill Nye

About 15 minutes from writing this post, I discovered a website called FutureMe. The whole idea behind this site is that you can write a letter that gets emailed to yourself at a future date. Admittedly this is a little corny, but I decided to suck up my ego and write myself a message. What I came up with was a mash-up of events from my private diary and from a post idea that I was previously unable to articulate. Anyway, here’s what I sent:

“Dear future Robert,

Last Friday, for me, I went to see Kid Cudi in Madison. The show was pretty good except for that part where some dude on X charged through everyone and I got Henessy spilled all over my new jeans.

The next day I ended up watching “Naked Lunch” on the couch and started listening to the band Portishead. Latter in the afternoon I went online and discovered that I’d set an all time record for earning money from the Internet.

After seeing my earnings I made a promise to myself, by December 1st (the day you receive this letter) I want to no longer have a 9 – 5 job. I hope your enthusiasm kept up and this goal comes true.

Next weekend I’ll be visiting La Crosse, I can’t wait to experience what you’ll be fondly remembering. I hope it’s as good in the present as it is through the filter of nostalgia.

Also, don’t forget that you promised to donate to a charity this Christmas. I’m thinking something related to domestic abuse, but you might have other ideas.

Before ending this letter, I want to address the quantum elephant in the room: the fact that we’re one in the same, merely separated by time. If we met, I don’t know if we’d even like each other. The present me wouldn’t want to spend a day with any of his past selves, I’d imagine you’re the same way. With that said, I am your foundation. What I do now has direct consequences on you. I’ll try my best to provide you with everything you might need.

I hope you have a great Christmas and that your 2014 looks bright. I hope that you make good on our goals and give something back to the world. Lastly, I hope you remember what it was like to be me.

I’ll see you in our memories,

Current Robert”