“Imagination is the voice of daring. If there is anything godlike about God, it is that. He dared to imagine everything.”

– Henry Miller, Sexus

Rich prose

For almost a year I avoided reading a lot of fiction. Like most men, I thought that I had outgrown make-believe stories about Eldritch horrors, messy divorces, and hard-drinking detectives. When you go ton the gym every day and have a set of life goals Holden Caulfield becomes less of a martyr and more of a whiny nuisance. Reading about a socially maladjusted dweeb is no longer something that appeals to you. It’s alien, something that might as well be set in a far away mystical land. You can’t relate anymore.

You also outgrow other genres. As was written long ago, “When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.” Spaceships, wizards, zombies, and all rest lose their appeal. There’s a reason that the golden age of science fiction is twelve and not twenty-seven.

While there’s nothing wrong with growing up there is something awful about segregating yourself from an entire area of thought. You become a philistine. Sure you might read and make a living as a writer, but you’re cutting yourself off from an entire world of rich prose. A book about fitness or business might have great information but it will always be written in a utilitarian manner. Updike never penned an exercise guide, if you want to write like him you’ll have to read something other than Brawn.

Blogs won’t increase your writing skills either. While there are a handful of good writers out there, most rely on jargon and simple descriptions in order to covey their point. Commenting on the fact that Joe Blow “looks like a gay beta” isn’t really that creative or hurtful. Describing him as “A creature with the grotesque and twisted visage of an ancient pagan’s solstice mask” is slightly better. It sounds more biblical and epic.

Joe Blow could be in some godforsaken village eating all of the townsfolk and then Beowulf could show up to chop his head off. Charging into his lair he’d see just how vile and repulsive the creature looked, filling the reader with terror and building suspense. When Joe Blow get reduced to being no more than a “gay beta” he loses something. He becomes another schmuck, some generic dork. Bad guy number thirty in that big shootout scene towards the end of Commando. We are deprived of any reason to hate him.

If you want to be descriptive you have to read descriptive books. Even if the subject might not be “cool” you still learn a lot. Henry Miller, Vladimir Nabokov, John Updike, Herman Melville, and countless others are great sources of rich prose. If you want to grow as a writer you need to challenge yourself and seek out deep works of literature.

“Complaining does not work as a strategy. We all have finite time and energy. Any time we spend whining is unlikely to help us achieve our goals. And it won’t make us happier.”

– Randy Pausch, The Last Lecture

Closing the email floodgates

At the start of this month I decided to make my challenge about helping others and teaching them how to make money online. Big mistake. While there were plenty of cool readers who emailed me I opened myself up to a surge of whiners and time wasters. Right now my inbox is still swamped and I’d pretty far behind on replying to every comment and questions.

The only thing that I learned from this challenge was that there is a reason most people don’t give out free advice. Although there were plenty of actual readers who listened to my suggestions and saw results, there were also a ton of blowhards who just showed up because they had nothing better to do. Since there was no barrier for them to ask stupid questions, I’d get spammed by 10 emails from the same guy in the span of a day. Foolishly I gave them an inch, they then tried to take a mile.

Message boards are a hive of scum

To kick off the month I went on several major sites and forums to announce that I would be answering questions regarding online business. I figured that it would drive blog traffic up and I’d get to hear from some cool and interesting people. Virtually none of the people who ended up contacting me actually looked through the site. A few of them would click the contact page, but that was about it. In fact, a guy who clicked over from a post asked me to summarize all of the content on here because he didn’t feel like reading through and finding useful information.

Likewise another dude emailed me to inform me that he didn’t “get” 30 Days To X and that I obviously didn’t know what I was doing since Bitcoin faucets are where the money is at. While I’m sure that the dude’s social ineptness and impressive Bitcoin miner will take him far, if he’s lucky he might even be able to buy extra-large Mountain Dew for his waifu, there’s no reason to smugly email someone else in order to criticize them.

Although the people I have mentioned above are extreme examples of the slugs I had to deal with, there were plenty of other annoying time wasters as well. As a businessman once said “Real entrepreneurs do what they say they’re going to do, wannabes ask about it and have tons and tons of coffee meetings.” The majority of non-regular readers just asked stupid questions. While I have no problem with people coming to me for advice, which is why I did this challenge anyway, asking about multiple things that a quick Google search could solve is not very productive. “How do I start a blog?” isn’t a bad question on its own, but immediately following it up with “That sounds like too much work, how do I make a Fiverr account?” is obnoxious and clearly shows that you have no actual plan or interest. You’re just looking for a get rich quick scheme.

Wantrepreneurs are a dime a dozen

Pareto principle never fails. 80% of the people who emailed me and were not regular readers will probably never be successful at anything. Anyone who accumulates thousands of posts on a site about entrepreneurship or business and still hasn’t actually done anything is a failure. You have the information, yet you are too lazy to actually use it. Bitcoin guy, summary guy, and the legions of people with annoying questions about nothing will all continue to be in the same place that they started.

Not all jobs are created equal

Apparently there is a lot of confusion about making money through the Internet. I’d never realized how many people break their backs to make peanuts until this month. I got a lot of questions about programs like Swagbucks, I hadn’t heard of it either, and doing surveys. My advice is to avoid doing either of them. You can make ten times as much in half the time by doing something like Fiverr. Last month Amazon For A Penny netted me more than a lot of people earn from Swagbucks and I didn’t even have to touch it. Don’t waste your time with stupid junk that doesn’t pay.

You need to take action

Lastly, getting work done and making money is all on you. I can’t spoon feed you information all the time, and most people are going to get sick of constantly having to answer your questions. If you want to make it you’ll have to actually put in an effort. Asking dozens of questions and waiting for ideal conditions will leave you empty-handed.

Conclusion

Most of the actual readers who emailed me had legitimate questions and ideas. It was great to hear from them. However, I was also bombarded with a bunch of garbage questions that were asked by people who will never take any action whatsoever. Rather than catering to these people, I’m going to come up with a new way to filter out time wasters while helping the people who want real advice.

“Winners never quit and quitters never win.”

– Vince Lombardi

Know when to quit

Quitting isn’t dishonorable or something to be ashamed of. I’ve quit nearly half of all the projects that I’ve ever started. Typically, I only try to work on projects where I would be in the top 25% of everyone in that field. Because of this I’ve given up on a lot of things that I simply didn’t have the aptitude for. For a while I had considered switching college majors and becoming a programmer. I was better at writing articles than I was at writing code, rather than struggling with my mediocre programing skill set I found a way to monetize what I was already good at.

Getting into the top 25% of something you are passionate about is easy.

I love lifting. The gym is like my second home and I spend so much time there that I was actually given a special key so that I can workout whenever I want. Holidays, the dead of night, I’ll go whenever. While I’ll never be a professional bodybuilder I have made huge gains. I went from being under 150 pounds to scrapping into 180 territory in just a year.

While I was never fat or anything like that, I was really small. When you’re six feet tall and 148 pounds you look scrawny. After a year of eating right, learning how to lift, and doing some heavy squats I filled out more. Although I still have a long way to go, I’m in better shape than most of the dudes that I see walking around. Serious lifting isn’t very popular in my neck of the woods and going out in a tight V-neck tends to draw attention.

Thanks to the obesity epidemic and that fact that “lifting is for queers,” as many manly men will tell you, I’m more muscular and more defined than a lot of other guys. Even though I won’t be starring in any action movies anytime soon, my confidence has gotten a nice bump. I’m also hopping to add some more muscle this year and build a stronger back.

How I became a successful freelancer in two weeks.

I love sales. Ever since I was a kid, when I’d have to sell popcorn and Christmas decorations for fundraiser, I’ve enjoyed selling things to people. When I have to get serious and whip up an argument about something I usually end up victorious. In high school I was a state finalist for impromptu speaking. In college I single handily won a class debate over the use of steroids. While I usually speak in a very lazy manner and often slur my words, when I get passionate about something I can spit fire.

When I started working on oDesk I was planning on quitting. Third world sweatshops could underbid me and seemed to be stealing of the work. Things looked grim. Rather than giving up I decided to fight on a new platform. If I couldn’t beat my enemies on their price, I could destroy them with my quality. A Timex and a Rolex have a lot of the same features. They both keep time, each one is water resistant, and both track the date. The difference is in the experience. Wearing a Timex Sub makes you some random guy. Donning a Rolex Sub turns you into a classy and sophisticated man about town.

Instead of breaking my back for table scraps I branded myself as an exclusive content writer. My hourly rate is set higher than most people skilled laborers would make. However, thanks to a limited time offer and temporary lull in my work, I’m able to offer clients my services at a drastically lower price than what I advertise. The customer gets the work they deserve and I’m able to make a living.

Changing my style earned me more customers than I would have ever imagined. I went from being a generic writer to a professional. While I quit fighting third world workers for clients, my decision paid off. Ten thousand hours of writing penny a word posts wouldn’t have allowed me to advance. There was no reason to keep trying.

Conclusion

Arnold Schwarzenegger tried a lot of different sports before he settled on bodybuilding. He swam, played soccer, and did a few other activities. While he wasn’t bad at any of them, he didn’t excel either. Bodybuilding gave him the greatest returns for his effort.

Hugh Hefner worked as a copywriter for Esquire. Hefner did so well at his job that the company fired him after he asked for a five dollar raise. Instead of groveling for his job back or looking for more menial work, he launched Playboy. By quitting what wasn’t working out anyway, Hefner was able to become far more successful than he ever would have been otherwise.

When you find yourself facing a brick wall it’s important to consider what is on the other side. Using your face to smash through cement and mortar doesn’t make you a tough guy if the only thing waiting for you on the other side is a pat on the head. There’s nothing noble about struggling to do something that will never pay off anyway.

“When you live your life by poor standards, you inflict damage on everyone who crosses your path, especially those you love.”

– Jordan Belfort

Not winners

Every time people talk about winners and losers they like to exaggerate. Winners jump out of bed at 4:45 every morning, go for a jog, save a baby from a burning building, and then start their day. Losers wake up inside a trashcan at noon and then spend the day playing video games and ogling their waifu.

While there’s nothing wrong with this idea, it’s hard to visualize it in real life. No one in my social circle is winning a triathlon 15 minutes before they rush off to synthesis a cure for cancer. Likewise, I don’t know anyone who is 700 pounds and plays World of Warcraft all day.

When you’re looking for people to listen to, or avoid, it can be difficult. Everyone thinks that they are an expert and will gladly tell you what you should and shouldn’t do. According to an article that I recently read in The Week, a magazine owned by the great Felix Dennis, 96% of Americans believe that they are in the top-tier of intelligence. Since the average American reads six books a year, saves less than 10% of his money, and is an all around schlub; the bar for genius must be pretty low these days.

On top of doing a plethora of obviously stupid things, like not saving money, over 80% of all Americans exhibit symptoms of clinical depression. Statistically speaking, if someone tries to give you advice they probably won’t be practicing what they preach. Additionally these people tend to breed negativity. If you tell them that you’re starting a business they aren’t going to say “Cool, a lot of people who are stupider than you have done it. I’m sure you’ll do great!” Instead they’ll suddenly become experts on the economy and cite a million different reasons for you not to do anything different.

While it would be tempting to rip into these people, a lot of them are fairly decent human beings. As long as they are in their comfort zone they’ll be pleasant to deal with. Instead of fighting them you should ask yourself one question: “Do I want to be like them?” The majority of people, while perfectly nice, don’t have anything that I’d ever want. They have lame jobs, live in a boring town, are out of shape, and have to “check in with the boss” before they can go to poker night. As Benjamin Franklin once observed “Most people die at 25 and aren’t buried until they’re 75.”

I’m 21 right now. I’ll probably be dead by 90 if not sooner. That gives me 69 years to have fun and enjoy myself. There’s no sense in wasting it on being miserable.

“Sales are contingent upon the attitude of the salesman – not the attitude of the prospect.”

– W. Clement Stone

oDesk cover letters that work

When I started freelancing on oDesk I sucked. My job applications and cover letters were horrible. I’d never had a to sell a service to anyone and my inexperience bled into each proposal. It took me a couple of months and a lot of reading before I was able to consistently sell my work. At one point I went through over 25 job applications before someone finally hired me. Since then I’ve worked on improving my sales techniques in order to land more clients. Now I get almost all of the jobs that I apply for.

Today I wanted to take a few minutes to explain, and showcase, some oDesk cover letters that work. While I’m not going to get into all the gruesome details, the advice that I am going to share will help increase most people’s sales. Additionally, everything that I recommend is easy to do.

Meet the client’s tone:

A customer looking for someone to write legal documents for his paper company isn’t going to want content with the same tone as someone who needs blog posts about the video games. As such, you should change-up your energy level when pitching a job. Below I’ve included my pitch for a job I got that involved writing about gaming trends.

Even though the message is corny and high-strung, it got me hired. The client wanted someone to write entertaining and opinionated posts. These audience was teenagers and guys in their 20’s. They want jokes and excitement. Anyone who grew up in the golden age of video game journalism will fondly remember gaming magazines for being corny and high-strung. They were filled with jokes and silly humor.

On the flip side, when you have a serious client don’t try pulling cocky or goofy humor. It’s better off to be professional and polite. Software, business, and politics aren’t places where jokes are appreciated.

Tell the client what you can offer them:

The biggest mistake that most people make is being self-centered. In order to make sales you have to sell the client on why you can offer them more than anyone else. If you can get that down you’ll start getting work.

Writing about appliances like juicers, blenders, toasters, and refrigerators is a pretty common oDesk job. These tasks get dozens of applicants who all want the contract. Some of them are even willing to write for less than a penny a word. The job that this image was taken from was paying anywhere between three and nine dollars an article. The average bid was something like $4.50. I set my rate at nine, filled out the application, and was hired immediately. I sold the customer on an investment, not a job. By hiring me he was going to get nothing but the best quality service.

Conclusion:

While I think that my advice will help, its important to study and practice sales on your own too. What works for me might not always work for you. In addition to practice, I’d recommend reading a couple of books that have really helped me to become a better salesman. I recently read It’s Not How Good You Are, Its How Good You Want to Be which I highly recommend. Also, Writing Philosophy made it a lot easier for me to understand how I could be more persuasive.