“Hey”
– Ten different guys opening message to my fake dating profile
Being a bit of a prankster I decided to make a fake female account on Plenty of Fish. I assumed that no one would message a girl named Meatyhaunches69. I was wrong.
Aside from the fact that this was obviously written be me, I assumed that no dude would ever actually find a girl like this to be attractive. The three kids thing, heightism, and obvious attitude should have been a big deterrent for most guys. This is basically the female equivalent to one of those Betapedia dudes you’d see calling himself bonerman9000 and saying that he only dated models.
I assumed that any dudes who did message my fake persona would probably be really sleazy. I was wrong again.
Like the time I went undercover as a Craigslist hooker, Meatyhaunches69 ended up getting a slew of messages that amounted to “Hey” or “Your hot.” Dudes who were posted up 50 miles away, in the comfort of their own homes, still threw out the weakest lines ever. I was flabbergasted.
The moral of this story
All trolling aside, there is a moral to this story. The vast majority of dudes either never talk to girls, or say some of the dumbest nonsense ever. Whenever I go out to bars or clubs most of the other guys will stand off in the corner and pound drinks until they’re staggering around. Only then will they actually try and go socialize.
The other afternoon I was listening to a great podcast where the hosts were discussing something similar. Guys who are into self improvement will surround themselves with like minded individuals. While this is great, they’ll end up assuming that everyone is on or above their level. When you and your friends are lifting weights, making money, and talking to girls it’s easy to forget that most people aren’t. It’s also really easy to make unfair comparisons that put a damper on your mood.
When I work on my business I’ll often beat myself up over no being as successful as some random guy I read about on a forum. Or I’d read a bodybuilding blog and then abstain from eating toast for the next month. Or a girl wouldn’t like one of my jokes and I’d sulk for the rest of the night trying to figure out why.
The vast majority of men are sitting at home on a Thursday night eating Cheetos and messaging “Hi” to girls on the Internet. If you go to the gym, have a hobby, and can hold a normal conversation you’re probably in the top 40% of all males.