“The only time to eat diet food is while you’re waiting for the steak to cook.”

– Julia Child

Grocery shopping for men

Most people cannot cook.

I don’t mean that in some pretentious manner either, I’m being literal. The average Millennial would have a hard time making scrambled eggs.

Look in a friend’s fridge. It’s almost all prepackaged food.

Cooking is a great way to save money while eating healthy.

You don’t have to be Bobby Flay to eat well.

I just got back from the supermarket a few minutes ago and am loaded up with all kinds of goodies.

And my total bill was less than $20.

Shopping basics

There are a few things that I always like to keep on hand. Here is a brief inventory of them:

• Ground beef
• Fruit
• Nuts
• Milk
• Oatmeal
• Yogurt
• Juice
• Eggs

That probably looks like it would be an expensive shopping list. And it would be if you weren’t smart about it. Yogurt and juice along can cost way more than $20.

Capitalize off of discounts

Yogurt goes bad quickly. Most grocery stores would rather sell it than have to throw expired cartons in the trash.

Because of this they often sell nearly expired yogurt at dirt cheap prices.

When you go shopping look for yogurt that’s on sale. You’ll be amazed at the cost.

In Iowa I could get single serving containers for $0.25 a piece.

Being dumb I’d only pick up one or two.

Then I realized that I wasn’t taking advantage of the situation.

Instead of buying a dollar’s worth, I’d invest $25 and have yogurt for weeks.

When there’s a sale take full advantage.

If you are afraid of the product expiring before you use it, there’s an easy solution.

Use your freezer

Buying all the discount yogurt seems a little wasteful.

You can’t eat that much in less than a week.

And that’s true.

Whatever I wasn’t going to have right away went in the freezer. It was safely preserved until I wanted it again.

Stock up when there’s a sale. Then stash some of your food in the freezer for later.

There was a recent discount on chicken. I loaded up and froze it for later.

Doing something like this will save you a ton of money.

Bonus: Three really easy meals any man can make

I know plenty of college kids who always whine about their lack of a kitchen.

Without a stove they are condemned to eating pizza puffs and Ramen noodles.

That’s false.

There are all kinds of meals that you can easily prepare with nothing but a microwave.

Below I’ve listed three simple recipes, two of which can be made in any dorm room across the nation.

Southwest omelet

Buy a hot pepper, tasty salsa, and some eggs.

Chop up the pepper and scramble the eggs.

Add them together and cook them on a stove.

Once cooked, pour salsa on top.

This is one of the easiest breakfasts in the world and it’s full of protein. Instead of eating cereal or some prepackaged breakfast bar, spend five minutes preparing this.

Proatmeal

You can pretty much make this meal anywhere.

As long as you have hot water, peanut butter, and oatmeal you’re good.

Heat up your oatmeal like you normally would and then add peanut butter.

If you want more nutrients substitute the peanut butter with protein powder.

This is a good post-workout meal and is simple enough that it can be prepared with nothing more than a microwave.

Hamburgers

I feel like an idiot typing this out. However, there are a lot of guys who seem to forget about inexpensive sources of protein like ground beef. Frying up a pound of burger patties is a lot cheaper, and healthier, than going out to eat.

What I love about hamburgers is the fact that you can cook them in the microwave.

This is great if you live in a college dorm since it spares you from having to eat nothing but carb filled snacks.

Slap some patties together and cook them until they are no longer pink. Extra points if you fry up a couple of eggs to eat with them.

There’s no reason you shouldn’t cook

None of the meals that I listed above take any talent to prepare.

A child could make them.

It always amazes me when guys complain about having to eat bad food, or that there’s no way for them to eat healthy.

An apple, yogurt, burger patty, and some milk is a pretty cheap dinner and it costs nothing to make.

“You lose money chasing women, never lose women chasing money”

– Nas

Pursue goals not girls

The average man’s life is built around chasing girls. Plenty of young dudes get duped into attending college on the promise that there will be girls and cheap beer.

The majority of men’s magazines use the same tactic. Buy this watch, girls will like it. Finance this car, you’ll have a lot of sex.

“Spend a lot of money on things you don’t really want or need and, somehow, you’ll get girls.”

Following this advice is pretty stupid.

I know plenty of guys who are wasting their time and money in hopes that it gets them laid.

On the flip side there’s the whole pick-up community.

Men should live on their friend’s couch and do nothing but go out and hit on girls all day.

“Having a job or doing normal things is for suckers, you should be out ‘gaming’ in the park!”

It’s not surprising that most of the guys who put all their focus on pick-up grow bitter and jaded. Eventually they do nothing but complain about “hypergamous sluts” and shout about the death of Western Civilization.

Both groups are stupid

When you spend all of your time and money chasing girls you can’t invest in yourself.

This creates an interesting problem…

When you fail to get girls, or when the girl you do swoop leaves, you end up with nothing. There’s no lasting reward either way.

You’re trying to build an empire on rented ground.

Both the pick-up wizard and the guy who always buys bottle service in the club are dedicating their finite time and resources to something with zero longevity or return.

The next day you’re back to square one.

Why goals are better than girls

Before someone complains in the comments, yes, there are dudes who have goals and are still terrible with women.

There are plenty of men who are successful in multiple areas of life, but suck with girls.

Every week it seems like there’s a new story about some actor or billionaire who tried to hit on a girl only for it to blow up in his face.

On average though, I’m going to speculate, a man on a mission is probably more successful with women than a normal dude or pick-up guru.

Here are a few reasons why:

• Girls know that your goal comes first

Pick-up guys always love to talk about avoiding validation. They write massive essays and eBooks on how men can make it look like they really aren’t all that interested in whichever girl they are hitting on.

Theoretically that’s great. And I’d definitely agree that any dude who is overeager to talk to girls, or always complimenting them, comes across as weird or needy.

But the whole idea of not validating girls is kind of lost once you’re spending every second of free time trying to sleep with them.

A legitimate goal is something that girls have to compete against for your attention.

If you have something that you’re passionate about you never have to worry about referring to pick-up books to make sure that you aren’t coming across as too needy.

• You actually have something interesting to say

If all your time is spent thinking about girls you’re going to be a pretty boring guy. Every dude I’ve ever met who was focused on nothing but pick-up was dull. And girls could sense that too.

Yes, you can memorize all kinds of jokes and stories, but you’re still going to sound like some robotic nerd.

When there’s something that you have a passion for you’re going to put energy into your words. That energy is going to engage everyone who listens.

Some guy who’s talking about how much he loves his sailboat or his guitar is going to draw a more women to him than the dude who only repeats stupid lines that he memorized from a book.

• There’s always something for you

When some pick-up guy strikes out he’ll have a meltdown. Forums and blogs are filled with these.

And it’s perfectly natural.

Putting everything you’ve got towards the chance of getting laid is like betting your paycheck on a game of roulette.

There is no guarantee that you’ll get anything back. And when you lose you’re going to be frustrated.

I’ve had plenty of instances where I broke up with a girl, or wasn’t getting a lot of female attention, and it didn’t bother me.

I had other stuff going on in my life and that was far more important than having sex.

Should you still go after girls?

I’m obviously not saying that you should swear off women or join one of those Men Going Their Own Way cults. In fact, you should probably spend some time learning about female psychology and read a few game books.

I was big into pick-up when I was 18 and I think that it helped me out quite a bit.

However, focusing solely on girls isn’t a good long-term plan.

You need to have a life mission that’s bigger than going out on Friday night and trying to hook up.

Something like writing a book, building a blog, learning to play a musical instrument, or getting in shape will make you far happier at the end of the day.

“The mind is a powerful thing. It can take you through walls.”

– Denis Avey, The Man Who Broke Into Auschwitz: A True Story of World War II

An important lesson you can learn from the elephant

As a child I once read about how circuses kept their elephants from escaping. Since elephants are huge containing them seemed difficult. If they got mad they could easily smash through any obstacles and rampage around.

Building an elephant proof cage was pretty impractical.

One ingenious trainer came up with a solution.

He took young elephants and tied them up with a thick piece of rope. When they tried to break free the rope was too heavy and strong. Every time that the baby elephants would attempt escape they failed.

After a while the elephants would simply assume that they could not get away. Even as full-grown adults they wouldn’t bother trying to fight against their captivity.

Psychological conditioning turned flimsy ropes into inescapable shackles.

Don’t be like the elephant

It’s pretty easy to get bogged down with failure. Over the past year I’ve faced a dozen catastrophes that seemed like certain doom.

My review writing business on Fiverr crashed.

I contracted a gruesome case of folliculitis.

Goofing off caused me to cancel a trip abroad.

There were multiple things that seemed horrible when they happened. Each of them could have easily defeated me. Some of them almost did too.

But in the end I got over all of them.

Instead of writing reviews for $5 a piece, I decided to become a copywriter. It paid a thousand times more than Fiverr ever could have.

My folliculitis cleared up and hasn’t reappeared. Taking off my shirt is no longer embarrassing.

By realigning my goals I was able to reschedule my trip and move overseas. It happened a few months later than I had hoped for, but ultimately wasn’t a huge deal.

The difference between failure and the fear of failure

Doing bad at something or failing isn’t the end of the world. You’ll recover. It might take a month or a year, but you’ll bounce back.

Thinking that you’re going to fail is a bigger problem. Unless you actively work to face your fears you’ll never be able to overcome them. You’ll be the elephant stuck at the circus with nothing but a flimsy piece of rope standing between him and his freedom.

“The only thing standing between you and your goal is the bullsh*t story you keep telling yourself as to why you can’t achieve it.”

– Jordan Belfort

How to triple your motivation

Motivation is a funny thing. If you need someone else to provide it you’ll never succeed.

There are plenty of people who buy dozens of Tony Robbins and Stephen Covey products that do nothing for them. It isn’t because the products sucked either. The buyers were simply looking for a magic solution. An item that would solve all their life problems within the first 30 minutes and without requiring them to take action.

Outside of a Dungeons & Dragons game there aren’t too many magic books.

However, if you don’t find a frequent source of motivation, you’ll quit moving forward.

You need something to help push you along and get you fired up in the morning. Inspiration can fuel your own drive and take you to places you’d never imagine.

While I like self-help books and tapes, I have a nasty habit of abandoning them.It’s something that a lot of guys accidentally do.

You pick up the book when times are tough and then toss it to the side once things start going well.

Fortunately there’s an easy solution that is inescapable.

The picture or list that you cannot avoid

I’ve always wanted to live next to the ocean. Moving to the West Coast was my number one goal of 2014. I’d get up in the morning, listen to some great YouTube speeches, and then get to work.

It worked wonders for about a month.

After that I started to forget about my motivational speeches and self-help books. Instead of focusing on my goals I got distracted by girls and partying.

One day I woke up and realized that it was three months past my deadline for moving and I was still in the same place.

That’s when I knew it was time for some action.

I found a picture of the place I wanted to live and set it as the background to my computer. Every time that I wanted to take a break from my work and goof-off online I had to see my goal.

I also wrote my goal down on a piece of paper and stuck it to the door of my room.

Any time I was leaving I had to see my goal.

Within a month I had my plane ticket and all the money that I’d need.

If you have to see what you want you aren’t going to make up excuses as to why it can’t be yours.

This month I wanted to build 30 Days To X into a larger site. It’s a goal I could easily blow off. Right now I’m sick, there’s tourist stuff I could do, and I make more money with my actual writing job than I do as a blogger.

To combat this I made my goal unavoidable.

I filled my phone with alarms telling me to do various site tasks at different points throughout the day.

I wrote out long lists of goals that I attached to all the doors.

Wherever I turn there’s something telling me that I can’t back down.

How to use this in your own life

Anything you want is worth tackling head-on. Buying a book that you throw under your bed will never help you. Ordering some motivational tapes that just collect dust is a waste of money.

Get some paper and write down your goal. Then stick it somewhere that you have to look. Your bedroom door, the kitchen, under the toilet lid. It doesn’t matter.

As long as you can’t avoid it you can’t make excuses.

“I’ve been quite a late developer on the clothes front, but I’ve suddenly realized it is one of life’s joys.”

– Benedict Cumberbatch

Easy way for skinny guys to look bigger

Today’s post might sound like common sense, but it’s something that took me 18 years to learn.

If you’re a skinny guy you need to make sure that your clothing fits.

Like I said, this sounds pretty obvious. However, I see a lot of guys who wear outfits that are way too big for their bodies.

A few weeks ago I was on the phone chatting with a friend. We ended up joking about how high-fashion in Iowa consisted of not being fat and wearing an outfit that wasn’t three sizes too large.

This problem isn’t limited to college kids in the Midwest though. Last year I met Odd Future frontman Tyler, The Creator. If you’ve ever watched an Odd Future music video you’ll know that Tyler is pretty buff. But when I met him the dude looked like a twig. He was in a t-shirt that was about six sizes larger than it should have been.

Hip-hop and pop music has made baggy clothing somewhat cool. Baggy shirts are great to wear if you’re famous, but the average guy will always look stupid in them. This is especially true for men who are skinny.

If you’re huge you can, kind of, pull off some looser clothing. If you aren’t you’ll just look ever smaller.

An actual example (using me)

The following two pictures are both of me. Each one was taken earlier today. The first one was snapped right after I woke up. In it I have bed head and am still half asleep. The second one was taken after I went to the gym and got a haircut.

In the image above I look fairly buff. I obviously don’t look like Arnold or anything, but I still look like a guy who works out.

This picture was taken right after I got home. I’d just been lifting and was actually more pumped up than I am in the first photo. However you’d never know that because I’m drowning in a shirt that’s way too big for my body. It looks like I have pencils for arms and a giant gut.

Buying normal clothes is not that hard

That big yellow shirt that is way too loose for me actually cost more than the black v-neck in my first picture. The v-neck set me back $5 at Burlington Coat Factory. I also have a Calvin Klein v-neck that gets a lot of compliments and was less than $20.

The same thing goes with dress shirts. I own a lot of “nice” collared shirts that cost me less than $50. Because they actually fit people think that they look good. The stuff that I buy on sale generally looks better than a lot of the expensive and “edgy,” but ill-fitting, stuff that other people like to wear.

Next time you go clothes shopping look for some smaller shirts. You obviously don’t want to wear skin-tight outfits, but form-fitting material is going to improve your appearance greatly.