“Barbarism is the natural state of mankind, civilization is unnatural. It is a whim of circumstance. And barbarism must always ultimately triumph.”

– Robert E. Howard, The Conquering Sword of Conan

I have no shame in admitting that Robert E. Howard is one of my all time favorite authors. Even if you’re unfamiliar with his works, you probably already know quite a few of his characters like Conan the Barbarian and Red Sonja.

Within The Robert E. Howard Omnibus you’ll find a variety that runs the gambit from cosmic horror, to sports, to fantasy; and often within the same story. One of my favorite tales from this collection was Almuric, a story that reads like a fusion between Minecraft and the Paleo Diet.

One of Howard’s strengths was that, unlike contemporary fiction writers, he celebrated the the power and raw savagery associated with masculinity. These are old fashion tales of men being men. In the era of skinny jeans and effeminate hipsters, these stories are a much welcomed relief.

Writing wise, I think Howard had tremendous talent. Unlike most pulp writers of his time, Howard was able to convey excitement and energy without falling back on hyperbole. Take his description of this thieves den from The Tower of the Elephant:

“Torches flared murkily on the revels in the Maul, where the thieves of the east held carnival by night. In the Maul they could carouse and roar as they liked, for honest people shunned the quarter, and watchmen, well paid with stained coins, did not interfere with their sport. Along the crooked, unpaved streets with their heaps of refuse and sloppy puddles, drunken roisterers staggered, roaring. Steel glinted in the shadows where wolf preyed on wolf, and from the darkness rose the shrill laughter of women, and the sounds of scufflings and stragglings. Torchlight licked luridly from broken windows and wide-thrown doors, and out of these doors, stale smells of wine and rank sweaty bodies, clamor of drinking jacks and fists hammered on rough tables, snatches of obscene songs, rushed like a blow in the face.”

It’s easy to forget that this quality of writing was appearing in magazines like this:

My only complaint with this collection is that it gets redundant. Like most anthologies, the reader tires of the subject matter before the book is over. As such, reading one or two stories a week would be more than sufficient. There are also a few racial slurs, Howard wrote during the 1930’s, that some might find inappropriate. Nothing said is too offensive, and I don’t think anyone’s life will be ruined by derogatory terms that infrequently surface.

If you’re looking for some inexpensive entertainment this weekend, you could do a lot worse than picking up a copy of The Robert E. Howard Omnibus. For the two dollar price tag, this collection is a great way to get acquainted with Howard’s life work.

“Ah, yes, of course. Travel to a country and have an authentic cultural experience, while forcing another nation’s language down its throat.”

– English Teacher X, Guide To Teaching English Abroad

Like every other college kid in America, I always imaged that teaching English in a foreign country would be the best job ever. You only have to work 30 hours a week, and you have a whole bunch of free time to go exploring. In all honesty, I’ve considered switching to an Education Major just so that I could have this type of job. Fortunately, I sat down and read English Teacher X’s Guide To Teaching English Abroad, before I marched off to the admissions office.

As it turns out, teaching English overseas isn’t all Thai food and surfing; it’s actually a pretty brutal job. In one of the first sections of the book, X dispels the romanticized image of the English teacher: 

“Step away from that old office grind, the old nine-to-five prison. The new car, the new washer-dryer combo, the new computer every three years. The gilded cage of life in the West.

Yes indeed! Leave all that behind! Step into a world where you’re living in a cruddy run-down flat shared with another person! Where you rarely have a steady supply of hot water! Where you can’t afford nice clothes, a car, OR a computer! Where you wash your clothes in the bathtub.

Hey, but at least you’re not working nine to five!”

While the first few sections of Guide To Teaching English Abroad are a bit discouraging, they were still highly entertaining. At one point X makes a hilarious case for why being a pirate is more rewarding than teaching English, and his argument actually had me roaring in laughter.

After doing his best to warn off potential English teacher’s, X uses the rest of the book to convey some incredibly useful information on teaching English abroad. This material runs the gambit from explaining the various types of teaching certificates and their benefits, to a guide entitled “Activities that suck and what to do about them.”

Though it would be easy for a book like this to slip into the realm of mundane instructional manual, Guide To Teaching English Abroad has a lot of humor injected into it. For example, when explaining how to properly introduce yourself to a class, X provides the following advice:

“Try this: Get some dice. Write on the board

1) What

2) Where

3) Who

4) Why

5) When

6) How

Students roll the dice, then ask you a question with the proper question word. For example, student rolls a 2 – ‘Where’ – and asks the teacher ‘Where is your favorite strip club?'”

If you’re interested in teaching, public speaking, or travel; I suggest you pick up Guide To Teaching English Abroad. It’s a deep, honest, educational, and interesting read. Even if you aren’t planning on traveling overseas to teach, this book has some great information on interacting and communicating with others.

As I’ve mentioned before, English Teacher X is running a special $2.99 special on all of his Kindle books. Be sure to also check out To Travel Hopelessly and Vodkaberg.

“Nine years. ‘Talk about a drinking binge that got out of control,’ I muttered to myself.”

– English Teacher X, Vodkaberg

Having loved To Travel Hopelessly, I’ve decided to review another of English Teacher X’s titles. Enjoy:

Vodkaberg: Nine Years in Russia

Vodkaberg is quite possibly the grittiest and most fun book that I’ve read all year. Set during English Teacher X’s nine year stay in Russia, Vodkaberg recounts the antics of a young man living in a city teeming with cheap booze and loose women. Despite the city’s portrayal as a rundown dump infested with thugs and low-level gangsters, the first half of this book had me desperately wanting to book a flight to The Motherland. The allure of super hot women, with a fetish for Western men, and non-stop partying had me overlooking the poor living conditions.

“Lord, do Russian women love high heels. At the supermarket, in a foot of snow, on ice, you name it. As a Russian girl once said to me, ‘I feel like I don’t have legs if I don’t have on high heels.’

As I walked around the city, beautiful high-cheekboned, thin, sexy women seemed to be everywhere, stalking around on high heels. My classes, on the trams, in the streets. Everywhere.”

Unfortunately, as time progresses and infrastructure improves, the party wears off. Women grow colder, drinks become pricier, and materialism begins to creep in.

“Culturally, it was now more like 1987 or 1988. Morning in Russia. A kind of blasé conservatism and shallowness. No longer were people excited about the great social changes – they just wanted to spend the money.”

During the second half of the book, a more melancholy tone sets in. The “English groupies” begin to fade away, and X starts to question some of the aspects of his life. There’s still plenty of debauchery: people get roofied, political assassinations are attempted, and copious amounts of vodka are consumed. Yet it becomes apparent that “the good old days” are over.

Despite the second act’s darker tone, Vodkaberg was still a highly entertaining read. If you’re interested in Russia, travel, or uncouth memoirs; I highly recommend this book.

P.S. English Teacher X is currently running a special offer: For the rest of March, all his titles are currently priced at only $2.99.

In case I don’t get around to reviewing them before the deal ends, I encourage you to also check out: How To Survive Living Abroad and Guide To Teaching English Abroad.

“While it’s true that I had had many failures in my hustling career, I’d also had many successes. I had created blogs that got thousands of readers and were widely linked across the Internet. More importantly, I had learned from my mistakes and didn’t repeat them, getting closer to perfection each time.”

– Matt Forney, Confessions of an Online Hustler

If you’re interested in making money online, you need to pick up a copy of Confessions of an Online Hustler, by Matt Forney. In the past three years I’ve read at least two dozen books about web businesses and professional blogging, none of which hold a candle to this book. For a first time author, Forney has managed to produce a comprehensive guide to online business that puts The 4-Hour Workweek to shame.

What I liked most about Confessions of an Online Hustler, was the fact that it was written honestly. Forney isn’t some quack selling pie in the sky theories, he’s a man who’s spent almost a full decade running various online ventures. Right out of the gates Forney addresses the age-old “owning a website will make you wealthy” myth:

“If you want money that badly, put this book down right now, march over to the nearest McDonald’s or Walmart and fill out an application. Whatever insultingly low wage they pay you is far more than you’ll ever make from online advertising.”

As I said, this is real knowledge being dropped by a real expert. I’ve never found this type of honesty in any of the other online business books that I’ve read.

Confessions of an Online Hustler also runs circles around it’s competition, because it actually gives practical advice. Rather than wasting the readers time with selfish brags (à la The 4-Hour Workweek), Forney provides advice and guidance to his audience. There’s an incredibly useful section on becoming a better writer, several chapters dedicated to construction of the actual website, and (my personal favorite) a guide on dealing with haters and stalkers.

If you’re interested in marketing, product development, making money online, or simply blogging for fun; I encourage you to pick up a copy of Confessions of an Online Hustler.

As an added bonus Matt Forney is running a special: between now and Sunday, all copies of Confessions of an Online Hustler will be available for half-off the retail price.

“The less you fear, the more power you will have and the more fully you will live.”

– Robert Greene, The 50th Law

Whether you fully realize it or not, almost all of us are afraid. Afraid of being mocked, disowned, rejected, and failing. What would you do if you could live without fear?

Enter: The 50th Law, by Robert Greene and 50 Cent. Built around 50 Cent’s rise from street hustler to mogul, The 50th Law examines how fearlessness and ambition breed success.

While I initially planned on reading this book for entertainment purposes only, I ended up learning some incredibly valuable lessons. As it turns out dealing drugs is a lot like being a law-abiding entrepreneur. In both games you can only rely on yourself, and you need to be fully immersed in your environment at all times. As teenage 50 Cent learned:

“The only way to survive was to admit that you were on your own, learn to make your own decisions, and trust your judgement.”

I found many of The 50th Law‘s anecdotes to be equally relatable and highly motivating. In the subsection “Reversal of Perspective,” I realized that 50 Cent and I share a similar life philosophy based off of Stoicism. This outlook allows for any negative situation to be turned into an opportunity:

“In this philosophy every event is seen as fated to occur. When you complain and rail against circumstances, you fall out of balance with the natural state of things; you wish things were different. What you must do instead is accept the fact that all events occur for a reason, and that it is within your capacity to see this reason as a positive.”

I found this book to be highly motivating, very insightful, and quite interesting. Reading 50’s life story also made me develop a new level of respect for him. If you’re interested in business and pushing yourself towards success, I highly recommend The 50th Law.