“Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.”
– Mark Twain
After spending most of the winter indoors working, and then later developing a gross case of folliculitis that kept me from going out, I’m excited for spring to finally be here. In honor of the warm weather I’ve decided to post a shopping list of clothes that I’m buying for this season. Today’s post is going to be part of an ongoing seasonal series about clothing.
Spring lineup: accessories
Spring and summer are when I misplace and lose a lot of my clothing items and accessories. In the past I would always make the mistake of buying fairly expensive items, only for them to either disappear or get ruined. Two years ago I bought an expensive pair of Oakley sunglasses. I was 18 at the time and the glasses set me back almost my entire week’s paycheck. By the time that summer was over my glasses were gone. Someone had stolen them. I was out two hundred dollars and had nothing to show for it.
Last year I bought a pair of Armani sunglasses. While thy didn’t go missing, they were overpriced and I was constantly nervous about losing them. When I went to the beach I was afraid that they would be stolen, scratched, or otherwise damaged.
Additionally, there was no advantage to buying expensive sunglasses. Contrary to what men’s magazine ads might imply, buying expensive sunglasses is not a surefire way to meet girls. It’s like those old AXE deodorant commercials, but for adults. You could buy some five dollar sunglasses from the gas station and probably have the exact same results. In fact, that’s kind of what I am doing.
I bought a cheap pair of Retro P3 Sunglasses off Amazon. They cost me five bucks and came with free shipping. I wanted some round glasses anyway, my head looks like a basketball so these will fit my face, and I figured that I might as well go the cheap route. When I inevitably get hit in the face with a volleyball or step on my glasses, I won’t be out two hundred dollars.
I actually own a couple watches already. However, I decided to pick up another one. During the summer I don’t want to wear anything gaudy, but I still want my wrist to stand out. As such, I ordered a Stuhrling Original Men’s Skeleton Watch. For a hundred bucks with free shipping it’s a bargain.
The only clothing accessory that I’ve ever gotten compliments on has been my shoes. Girls can’t see the label on your glasses or watch, but they can see what’s on your feet. While most guys wear flip-flops or sandals, I prefer closed toed shoes. being a big fan of Ralph Lauren, I decided to order a pair of Bienne II Boat Shoes. While they might cost more than a pair of Crocs, they also look infinity better.
In addition to clothes, every man should work on maximizing his body. A gym membership, juicer, and good posture are more important than the latest pair of trendy jeans. All the Viktor & Rolf clothes in the world won’t make you look good if you’re out of shape and look unhealthy.